Family-Friendly Movie Night…Gone Wrong

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Image Credit: Pixabay

I love doing movie nights. Who doesn’t? Right? Well, I had decided to do a movie night at home with my kids on Friday. I went out and bought chips, popcorn, some vegetables to appease the grumpy Vegetable Gods, various fruits, more chips and some dips, crackers and pickles, cheese, juice boxes, gummy bears, jelly beans, paper plates, napkins, etc., etc., etc.

I may have gone a little overboard with the food and it may have been cheaper in the end to order a couple of medium-sized pizzas, but I wanted the night to be fun and special. And I had wanted to pick out a fun and special movie for my kids to watch. And it just so happened that Walmart had Deadpool on sale. And I thought: Oh look! Another Marvel Comics movie. And aw, Deadpool sort of looks like Spider-Man. How cute. I love Spider-Man. My kids love Spider-Man. I wonder if this Deadpool character is at all like Spider-Man? Maybe I should ask someone before buying it…? Nah, I’ll just get it. I mean, it’s a Marvel movie. Can’t go wrong with a Marvel movie. Right?

…Yeah.

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Don’t let this innocent pose fool you. This guy will f*ck you up.

In my (weak) defense, I apparently live under a rock and knew nothing about Deadpool before watching it for the first time (with my kids). I vaguely recall seeing a (very censored) promotional commercial for it on TV while it was playing in the theater a few months back, and I knew he wore a red suit and that Ryan Reynolds played him–but that was about it.

So there I was on Friday night, popping popcorn and cutting up cantaloupe, as my kids buzzed around all excited about Movie Night and the “special movie” that Mommy had picked out for them to watch.

…Yeah.

Thank goodness for my coffee table full of mostly teeth-rotting, sugary junk-crap, because 5 minutes into the movie I was urging my kids to turn around, plug their ears, and pig out on the food while I desperately searched around for the DVD remote to press PAUSE or STOP or…something.

The morale of this story? I guess it would be that not all guys in red suits are…er…family-friendly. And that sometimes, as a parent, we make “oopsy” mistakes. And that this Deadpool guy seriously, seriously needs a time-out and a mouth-washing. And that next time I should really climb out from underneath my rock and do some research on a movie before purchasing it for my kids.

Anyways, till next time…

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11 thoughts on “Family-Friendly Movie Night…Gone Wrong

  1. VE says:

    Glad if you managed to find the remote quick 🙂 I liked that movie it was fun -fun, but not with kids you would want to watch it. By the way did you manage to watch the movie or you just returned it?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. traceyr1984 says:

    We had a similar movie mishap with “Flight” starring Denzel Washington. I thought it was going to be about a crash investigation (which it was) but I wasn’t prepared for drug use and naked women. That was a “sorry son but this movie is not appropriate for you” awkward moment.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. ofopinions says:

    This was brilliant! First of all, A+ on the food haul. I’d have loved to be your kid on that day! Haven’t seen Deadpool yet, though I do know “about” it. But, other Marvel movies aren’t so innocent either. I quote Loki from The Avengers (2012) all the time, until I actually looked up “mewling quim”. I suggest you look it up too, if you don’t know what it means either! The horror, that I’d see kids quoting Loki, or I’d quote Loki with them! And to think he says that to Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson), truly one of the most badass female characters ever, makes it even worse.

    I can’t stop looking at the gif above. Can I go join them?

    Liked by 1 person

    • tamaraprokopchuk says:

      Nothing better than Deadpool and Spider-Man breaking out in a synchronized dance move! Ha ha!
      I wouldn’t call myself a crazy and obsessed Marvel fan (unless it is Spider-Man). Which is why I honestly had no clue what Deadpool and his…charming personality…was like. Oops.
      At least my kids enjoyed the food. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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